Bruce C. Zivley, Attorney at Law

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Navigating December holidays post-divorce

Holidays tend to inspire various traditions within families. When a family is rearranged and/or reconstructed as a result of divorce, some traditions must be reconfigured as well. This transition can be difficult on adults and children alike. Thankfully, keeping a few things in mind can help you and your kids have as joyous a holiday season as is possible under the circumstances.

First, if there was ever a time to keep your kids’ best interests in mind, the holiday season is it. You and your former spouse should arrange the holidays so that your children feel as safe, secure, loved and appreciated as possible. This can best be achieved by communicating openly, clearly and with an eye towards compromise.

It may work best for you to alternate, divide or share the holidays with your co-parent. Only you best understand your family’s unique situation. You may have to be creative in your approach, but if you work to better your children’s holidays, rewards for your efforts will be great.

Second, if you are starting to feel the stress or loneliness of the season, please take some time to take care of yourself. If you can treat yourself to something that will boost your spirits, do so. Kids are not the only ones who need care and comfort at this time of year.

Finally, if you can balance old traditions with brand new ones, please do. There is nothing wrong with honoring the old and creating the new. This kind of balance may even strengthen and inspire you into the new year.

Source: The Huffington Post, “Divorced? You Can Survive and Thrive During the Holidays!” Nancy Lang, Dec. 10, 2013

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