Bruce C. Zivley, Attorney at Law

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The silver linings of dark and dreary divorces

Some divorces are surprisingly amicable. Others are emotionally draining and physically taxing. Whether your divorce is proving to be a rather dark and dreary affair or only has dark moments, it is completely normal for you to feel a host of negative emotions about your divorce either regularly or from time to time.

Thankfully, there are silver linings to even the most trying divorces, if you can allow yourself to see them. Each divorce, like each marriage, is unique. Therefore, these silver linings may not be the same for everyone. However, there are a few bright outcomes that tend to apply fairly universally to individuals who have chosen to divorce.

First, divorce will likely prove to you fairly quickly who you can truly count on and who may have not earned your trust as firmly as you once believed they did. Not all friends and family members will handle your divorce supportively. Some will likely not take an active role in helping you heal because they are too overwhelmed with events occurring in their own lives. However, others will fail to be supportive for reasons you might not expect. In the end, those who stand with you and support you will have deepened themselves in your eyes and proven to be invaluable parts of your life.

Second, divorce allows you to reevaluate the way in which you are living your life. From what you possess to how you approach relationships, everything you do can evolve naturally as a reaction to divorce. Divorce can make you bitter or it can inspire you to grow and thrive once you have properly grieved.

Source: The Huffington Post, “Three Good Things About Your Otherwise Terrible Divorce,” Christina Pesoli, Jan. 6, 2014

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